31

Yesterday was my 31st birthday, and lemme tell ya, it was infinitely better than my 30th.  Pardon me while I regale you with far too many details and with way too much enthusiasm! 

The party was so freakin' much fun, I don't even know where to begin.  I don't know if they ever read my blog, but I'm thinking the appropriate place to start is by thanking L (my SIL, whose idea it was to have the party, and who took the reins in organizing the whole thing) and A (my BFF, who was L's right-hand woman in planning and executing the festivities): I love you both, I couldn't hope for better friends!

As usual, I sucked at documenting any part of the setup or celebration itself with photographic evidence.  My mom was taking pictures during the party, so maybe some day I'll get my hands on those images, but for now all I have is this:

If you're wondering whether that's a homemade tiramisu cupcake, let me assure you that it is.  And it was even more delicious than it looks.  I didn't get photos of the other cupcake varieties that A, my mom, my niece S, and I made on Saturday afternoon, but they were:

Chocolate Stout

Strawberry Shortcake

Margarita (complete with sugared rim)

Lemon with Blueberry Compote

It was a lot of work for 3 dozen cupcakes, even with 4 people, but well worth the effort!  They were super fancy-lookin' and tasty, and a HUGE hit at the party. 

The decor was even better than I imagined.  We strung market lights over the patio and barbecue area, and under them were three cocktail tables with black and teal linens, each topped with candles and fuschia orchids.  More candles dotted each of the three decks that climb the embankment above the patio, with seating areas and hors d'oeuvres stations on the two decks that have ocean views.

Speaking of food, my family kicked ass pulling together several yummy dishes!  A made red pepper hummus and olive tapenade, L made brie en croute and fruit skewers, Hubs made mini teriyaki drumsticks, my mom made bbq meatballs, and my MIL made mini pigs-in-a-blanket. 

And of course you can't have a cocktail party without cocktails!  My dad provided the beer, wine, and sodas, and my sister D rocked it with two superb martinis: "Absolut Sexy Lemonade Punch" and the "Kitini" (my invention, ingredients below). 

The best part of course, were the guests!  Everyone had a great time, and I even got to see a family friend that I haven't talked to in ages.  (She was in rare form!)  It was nothing short of an amazing night. 

The Kitini (AKA: Knock You on Your Ass Frou-Frou Delight)

2 parts vodka

1 part orange vodka

2 parts cranberry juice cocktail

1 part Kiwi-Strawberry flavored Juicy Juice

A few good squeezes of fresh lime or lime juice

Shake with crushed ice, strain, and serve

Recommendation: Garnish with a small slice of watermelon or half a strawberry

Not just about work

My department is getting audited next week and this morning I was reminded that it's my ass on the line if it doesn't go well.  I've been super stressed about this audit because it's a follow up to the last one - which we actually passed, just one section of it was really bad.  (That didn't stop them from firing one of my employees over it though.)  The past several months we've been doing clean up and now it's time to see if all that work has paid off.  If not, my job could be at stake.  So that's why I woke up with a lead ball in the pit of my stomach this morning.

But logically I shouldn't be worried.  Isn't my goal to get out of this job at any cost?  I should be praying we bomb this audit just so I can finally be free!  I want to turn off the voice in my head telling me that people are going to think less of me if I "fail."  The truth is, I've done everything I can.  I've worked my ass off for a company that I don't respect and that has no respect for its employees, and if that's not enough then I'm done.  So fire me.  I'm BEGGING for it.

In other news, I got to fly with my dad in his plane on Monday.  I had to go out to the desert to help our new department on their first day of processing with our systems, and rather than drive the three hours to get there I decided to ask my dad if he'd fly me out.  He was really excited to take me, considering it was the first time I'd flown with him, and we had a great time.  The work day sucked of course, but that won't be what I remember about that day.  Instead I'll remember navigating the way home by landmarks 5,000 feet below us, seeing how gorgeous Southern California looks from up high, especially my neck of the woods, and spending some quality time alone with my dad.  We don't do that nearly enough.

My women's group is going really well too.  We had a little celebration last Friday to commemorate the end of the first quarter of 2011 and the beginngin of the second, and we had four new women join us!  I'm pretty proud of how quickly we're gaining interest.  The group is really helping me keep things in perspective and sort through the damage that infertility (and to be fair, other factors too) wreaked on my self-confidence over the past few years.  It reminds me to keep looking forward and be grateful for what I have.  It sounds cheesey, but if you're struggling I strongly recommend getting together regularly with your girlfriends to talk and encourage each other.  For me it helps me feel sane knowing I'm not the only one who feels a certain way, and I hear so many insightful things that I never would have thought of on my own.  I posted a link to our group's blog over on the left if you're interested in knowing more about us.

Okay back to work I go, gotta trudge through the end of this wretched week.  I'm super excited to have two whole days off this weekend (at least, I haven't heard that I have to work on Saturday so I'm assuming I don't) and I fully intend to be as lazy as possible on Saturday.  AF will have left town by then and it is sooo going to be ON with the Hubs this weekend!  Rowr.

Loving it

Oh my gosh, I can't even tell you how much I love this women's group!  We had our second meeting last night and it was just the perfect ending to my day.  I was in such a good mood last night, and I still am this morning.  We have two new members and at least one more who will be joining us at our next meeting.  Pretty soon there'll be too many of us to get together at each other's houses anymore.  Everyone is really excited about it and seem to enjoy our group quite a bit.  The sister of one of our members is even thinking about starting her own chapter in NYC, she's been so inspired by the things she's heard about us!  Check out our blog: http://www.considerbliss.blogspot.com/.

Obviously, my day got a lot better after I posted yesterday.  I was pretty down in the dumps about realizing my EDD is coming up next week, but I just threw myself into my work and ended up having a decent day.  I'm getting more familiar with my new boss, she's actually kind of cool.  She needs to work on her listening skills sometimes, but my employees and I are getting more praise and recognition than we ever have, which makes such a difference.  I'm still job hunting though, since I'm not yet entirely convinced this place isn't pure evil!

Everything also worked out for my grandma's birthday this weekend, and it turns out my ENTIRE immediate family is going down to San Diego to celebrate with her at my aunt and uncle's house.  I'm excited about it!  Hubs and I will be road-tripping down there with my little brother (he's actually taller than anyone else in the family and 28 years old, so maybe it's a tad strange to still call him "little"), which I'm looking forward to.  He's one of the funniest guys I know, so that should be an entertaining drive.

Other than that, can you say TGIF???  I'll be working a little late tonight, but whatever - I'm just happy I get to sleep in tomorrow!

The good stuff

Okay, so remember a couple of weeks ago when I said I have some news but I wasn't quite ready to share yet? Well I still don't feel like I can do it justice but I'm dying to tell you anyway, so here goes.

My friend A and I are starting a women's group! It's something she's been thinking about doing for months, and when she asked me to help I jumped at the chance. I find it difficult to explain the purpose of the group because technically speaking, there's no specific focus. We will talk about everything and anything that's important to us, with the intention of being open to learning new things and improving ourselves by hearing the different perspectives of other members. It'll also be a place for encouragement and support in setting and reaching personal goals. Our "slogan" is Girl talk, redirected, because it's definitely all about sharing and discussing, but without the griping, drama, or negativity that can sometimes arise when women get together to gab.

I hope that didn't sound too touchy-feely. Okay, the group is kind of touchy-feely, and even though I'm generally quite the opposite, I'm excited about it! It'll be good for my personal growth to be a part of it, and helping launch it with A somehow completely meets this need I had to DO SOMETHING. Preferably something useful. We had our first trial meeting last Friday and it went really well. There's a core group of 5 of us, and we're kind of slowly inviting others to join in as A and I feel our way through this process. We want it to be fun and enjoyable, but we do have some structure to keep things organized too. We have a blog (which I'm not quite ready to share with the world yet, but I'll eventually post a link), a Twitter account, and a FB page, which we're still working on as well.

So that's the BIG thing.  And I welcome any questions you might have, I'm not sure how much detail you're interested in.

Other stuff that's going on - Well for one, Hubs and I are working on improving our marriage, getting the ol' spark back and generally making our home life more fulfilling. I'm pretty excited about focusing on us - something I actually have control over! I think it will make us both a lot happier. We've been talking more about my job options as well. We determined that we can afford for me to take a job that pays a little less than what I'm making now, but that's more in line with my interests and skills. So that opens things up quite a bit and makes me feel a little hopeful. Another option is taking a stress leave while I continue to search for another job. That's not something I really want to do, but work is getting worse and worse almost every day. It's just a matter of time before something gives, I just hope that something isn't my sanity.

Thank you for the well-wishes yesterday, I'm actually feeling a lot better on the YI front today. Thank God too, I was at the point where I wanted to tear out my lady business with my fingernails for a while there! My new boss has been off my back most of today, I just have to stay off her radar for another hour and I can go home for a nice long, relaxing weekend :)

This weekend is gonna suck

Okay, maybe it won't suck completely.  But read on and I think you'll understand why I'm not looking forward to it one bit.

Reason #1 this weekend will suck:  I have to come in to work tomorrow for four hours.  It's really not that big of a deal; I plan on wearing overly comfy clothes and showering tonight so as to maximize my sleep time.  I'll be home by 12:30 and Hubs has to work anyway too.  Still, there's something a little disheartening about it being Friday when you know you still have an extra day of this crap to look forward to.

Before I tell you the second reason, maybe you should sit down.  Y'know, in case you were standing at your computer reading blogs.

Sitting down now?  Good.  Deep breath...

Because it's Superbowl.  Don't hurt me!  Football just doesn't do it for me.  And although under normal cirumstances I enjoy a Superbowl party as much as the next person, reason number three explains why these aren't normal circumstances.

Number three: At this party, there's an excellent chance I'll run into 3 or 4 of Hubs's friends' pregnant wives.  I haven't seen any of them since they got pregnant.  As much as I genuinely like each of them, I'm dreading this.  Hence the reason I haven't seen them since they got themselves in a family way.  They know about my IF, so hopefully it won't be as painful as I anticipate.  And if it is, Hubs gave me an out and said we can leave early if it's really bad.  I love that man.

At least the day is half over now.  Hope you're having a happy Friday :)

Forgetful, sad and angry (In other words, I'm a barrel of monkeys!)

My poor little melon is having a rough go of it lately. I simply can't seem to remember anything, and on top of that my thoughts are even more of a jumbled mess than usual. It's really irritating and I have a feeling it's going to get me into trouble.

It almost did today, actually. I completely forgot, even though I reminded myself several times, to bring T's bow bouquet to work with me so she'd have it for her rehearsal this afternoon! Luckily hubs got my voicemail and is bringing it to work with him (we work near each other, but far from home, and the wedding venue is even farther from home) so I won't look like a total idiot at the rehearsal. Thank God! For a minute there I thought I'd have to run to the drugstore for bows and paper plates to try to re-create the thing.

Since most of my time lately is spent doing and thinking about wedding stuff, I haven't been talking very much about my feelings about my miscarriage. And I definitely still have feelings; don't think I'm trying to be "strong." I could probably talk about it forever, but people don't want to hear about sad things. But I'm going through it. I cry almost every day. I get choked up thinking about it and whenever someone who knows asks me how I'm doing I have to blink away the tears. I can't concentrate. It really fucking sucks. Speaking of which, the anger is starting to make its appearance now too. Seriously, what the hell??? A miscarriage after infertility is one of the sickest jokes Mother Nature can play.

Ugh... I don't know what to say. There's not enough room in my brain to hold all the thoughts and fears and emotions that are in there. I can't give them all equal attention. No wonder I can't remember a damn thing!

Oh P.S., I am still bleeding freely after 2 weeks. I hope these herbs start working and I'm not one of those women who bleeds for 6 weeks straight. I am OVER wearing pads!

I made it!

Well I made it through A's bachelorette extravaganza! It actually wasn't too bad, I mean as far as being tired. It seemed to all hit me yesterday and I took a two hour nap shortly after getting home. Mmm... I could go for a nap right now too!

We stayed out late both nights, and yeah I was tired, but not falling over from exhaustion or anything. It was actually sort of interesting to be sober at the clubs and bars, and it was fun to people-watch. There was plenty of creeper-dodging going on too! A guy even approached me and tried to get me to dance with him, but luckily I am a master at deterring men. He was a bit creepy himself - it had to be close to 100 degrees inside the club and he was wearing a scarf, which was the first red flag. I sort of accidentally brushed him off me and onto another girl in our group, and I guess he was saying all kinds of crazy things to her like, "I love to love, do you like to love? Who do you like to love?" Freakin' weirdo. The second night we went to a more mellow bar (the first night was a too-cool-for-school type of club) with a lot more normal people, and that was more our style!

I did end up telling A my news over the weekend, and I'm glad I did. She was so happy and excited that she started crying, and every time we had a moment alone she'd ask questions and tell me how excited she was for me. It was nice. :) I think I'll tell my three other close friends sometime after my appointment on Thursday, but before my little birthday shindig on Saturday. I purposely only invited family and my four closest friends so that we wouldn't have to worry about keeping it a secret.

So all in all it was a good weekend. Except on Sunday I managed to throw out my back by hugging someone. Seriously?? How does that even happen?? Luckily I was able to get into my chiro on a walk-in this morning so hopefully I will be pain-free by the weekend. I start my vacation this Thursday and I absolutely cannot wait! Hubs has Thursday off so he can come along to my OB appt and then hopefully spend the day celebrating with me. And Friday I turn 30. Well, whatever! Nerdy Thirty, here I come!

Ear cancer and bar naps

I prefer not to be subjected to the vocal stylings of one Ms. Tina Turner. I know she's the Queen of Rock or whatever and most everyone loves her. But her voice sounds like sandpaper to me. Not pretty!

Every Friday morning the Hag blasts music from one of her more obscure albums (okay, I don't know if it's actually obscure, but I'd never heard any of these songs until I started working here) in an effort to spread her pre-weekend cheer. Well, almost every Friday. When her office is silent you know she's in a mood, and when she's in a mood she usually finds something to hassle me about. So as much as I can't stand Tina Turner, life is always better around the office on those Fridays when she's spewing her raspy lyrics than not!

So today I'm grateful for the ear cancer I've just been given, and giving an extra high-five to the corporate gods that the Hag is in jeans, which means she will likely be spending much of the day at another location! Fingers crossed! All in all, today's shaping up to be a decent day.

Bonus! I'm leaving work early to meet the girls and carpool down to L.A. for A's bachelorette weekend extravaganza! I am very nearly finished packing and I only have to pick up a couple things on my way home (procrastination is my middle name). I'm looking forward to spending most of the day tomorrow relaxing on the beach and soaking up some sun, and will somehow get through tonight's and tomorrow night's debauchery without falling asleep on the bar. I hope.

Maybe I'll luck out and one of the girls will be a lightweight and have to be taken back to the hotel early :)

On tantrums and bridal showers

Thank you Rain and Daisy, for your thoughtful responses to my last post about the "Tar.get Tantrum." I do get that tantrums are probably much harder for the parents than the surrounding public, and I didn't mean to come off like I blame all parents for all their children's bad behavior. Mostly I just wanted to vent.

This will probably make me sound like a terrible person, but I do think there are some parents that need to do more to address/correct their children's bad behavior in public. In this particular case, the child was probably just shy of 2 years old, so it's not like you could blame him. What got me was that both of the parents were there and he was the only child with them. One of them could have taken him outside until he calmed down. Or they could have picked up the pace and tried to finish up their shopping instead of leisurely meandering around the store as they were. Twenty minutes is a long time to let a child scream in public. Maybe there was some reason beyond what was apparent that they chose not to do anything, and that's anyone's guess. What it looked like to me was two parents choosing to ignore their child's behavior rather than deal with it. But as we know, I'm a pessimist so of course I'm going to jump to that conclusion! I'm sure most of you ladies are a lot more generous than I am in that respect. :)

Now, onto the weekend. What a whirlwind - throwing two bridal showers in 24 hours! Both of them turned out beautifully, naturally! T's was Tuscan-themed, held at her mom's home late Saturday afternoon/evening. We had tons of pasta, bread, and wine, the tables and flowers were gorgeous, the games were fun, and T was thrilled. It was a great, if exhausting, day. And T was so sweet, she gave me a set of really nice outdoor wine glasses (i.e. plastic) as a thank-you for throwing the shower. I was just saying how I needed some, since we do most of our entertaining outside, so I LOVE them!

A's shower was Asian-themed (and no, I didn't realize until just now that "T is for Tuscan" and "A is for Asian" LOL), and it took place in my backyard Sunday afternoon. A works for a caterer and one of the other bridesmaids is an event planner for a hotel, so everything looked really professional - matching tables and linens, fancy matching folding chairs, chaffing dishes for all the food (veggie stir-fry, egg rolls and pot stickers, with red velvet cake and mochi ice cream for dessert), etc. My backyard has never looked so nice! And the decorations were perfect. We had Tibetan prayer flags at the gate, a cute "lounge" area, paper lanterns, cherry blossoms, and lots of red! I know I know, "PICTURES!" I'll post them when I get them all loaded up onto my computer. Promise!

Well, that was pretty much my whole weekend - cooking, cleaning, loading, unloading, setting up, tearing down, and running around in heels... Hubs and I did also stop by my parents' house to take photos in our African garb last night. (My parents are sending the pics to their friends in Cameroon.) I think we looked pretty cute! I'll post those too when I get them.

Last and least, today is CD5, and unless she's teasing me, I think AF is already on her way out. That's probably thanks to the herbs from my acu, because my whole life AF has lasted 7 solid days. Last month was more like 6 days, and now 5? Nice! I'm not too enthusiastic about TTC this C though. I kind of figure, with a 0.1% chance of getting pregnant, why bother? On the other hand, if we don't try I'll kick myself later, so I'm sure we will regardless. At any rate, all I'm interested in right now is a nice long nap. If only I didn't have to wait until I got home!

Two weeks

Did I say I was feeling optimistic about TTC? Oh, well that must have been because I wasn't in the 2ww yet!! Oy... It's going to be a long two weeks...

Since I don't have much else to talk about, I guess I'll tell you about my weekend.

As planned, I headed down to the L.A. fashion district with my friend A and her other friend/bridesmaid, J, on Saturday. A was looking for a wedding dress that would knock her socks off, but unfortunately she came up empty-handed. So from there we headed up the street to Chinatown in search of decorations for her bridal shower and hit the jackpot! Yeah, technically A probably shouldn't have seen all the things J and I bought, but it's such a pain to get to downtown L.A., and an even bigger pain to get around once you're there, we just had to take advantage. We bought a bunch of really cute stuff - bamboo shoots for the favors, some prizes, paper lanterns, strings of lights, just about everything you need for an Asian-themed shower. I think it's going to turn out pretty cool :)

Sunday was a really productive day, shower-wise, as well. Hubs and I helped my brother and SIL move into their new house - which is actually my SIL's grandfather's house. (Grandpa has moved to an assisted living facility.) They've done an amazing job updating the place so far, but they still have a garage FULL of stuff. So SIL let me look through some of it to see if we wanted anything, and I found these green vintage glass salad plates that are absolutely gorgeous. They look valuable so I only asked to borrow them for my friend T's Tuscan-themed shower. I think they'll be perfect for the oil and vinegar on the tables, and they'll add a pop of color to the white tablecloths. After that we had dinner at my in-laws' house for grandma's birthday... and I scored some bread baskets and 2 big glass beverage dispensers as well! Thank goodness for having family that likes to entertain!

I still have a TON to do before the showers (in less than 2 weeks now, yikes!), but it feels like they're starting to come together, and I'm getting excited! And did you notice - 2ww, and 2 weeks until the showers? Hopefully that'll help me keep my mind off waiting. I love it when Providence shines down on me like that!

Watch my head spin off my neck!

Oh my goodness. I'm not sure how much longer I can hold out.

It's CD26 out of 28-ish.

You know me, I don't do HPTs. My cycles are way too regular, and I am way too tightly wound to start testing before AF is late. But I am reeeeally tempted this C. Two more days until AF is due. I still have a bunch more CM than usual, but I'm starting to wonder if it's just the Clomid causing it. Anyone experienced that with Clomid before? If I can just keep thinking that's it, I can manage to wait until Saturday to test. I need that level of realism to keep me from leaving work to buy a FRER right this second. As it is I'm feeling up my boobs every half hour - does it hurt on top? Under my arms? Anywhere? Not really... well, if I squeeze too hard, then yes...

Jeez I really hope no one catches me doing that!

I feel very period-y today, slightly crampy, and just like... full. Who knows, maybe I'll start a day early like last C. Whatever. My motto is better early than late if AF is coming anyway.

Ugh. I'm all over the place. How is it possible to feel this many emotions at the same time?????

Moving on...

I found out some of our friends hired a limo to take us to and from the wedding we're going to on Saturday. I thought it was really nice of them to include us. The wedding is just far enough away to make transportation a hassle if we want to drink (which, if I get a BFN, I will definitely be doing) and it's not terribly expensive for the convenience of the limo, so I'm looking forward to that.

My brother and SIL are also going to the wedding, as the groom is my SIL's cousin. And my brother actually dated the bride briefly right after HS. We live in the biggest small town ever, there are over 100,000 people here, but somehow everyone still knows everyone else. I think it's fun that our friends, the bride and groom, are going to sort of be family now too!

Okay that took my mind off my uterus for 2 minutes, now to figure out how to get through the rest of the day!

It's almost Friday, hooray!

Some good news

I referred a friend for a position at the company that I work for, and I found out today that they offered her the job and she accepted! She starts in a couple of weeks.

I'm so happy for her! She totally deserves it, and I know she'll do a great job. HR has been excited about her since they first saw her resume, so I really think it's going to be a good fit.

The icing on the cake - my company offers very nice employee referral bonuses, and I already know exactly how I'm going to spend mine. On acupuncture of course! After taxes it will pay for about 2+ months of treatments. Not too shabby! (But DANG those bonus taxes!!)

Is it just me or is this C DRAGGING? It's only CD 18, and we're still DTD EOD. I will say it's been nice not worrying about timing so much though. As long as we do it every other day until AF there's no way we should miss the window. I might just do this every month!

Hump day hodgepodge

Thanks for your comments on my OPK conundrum, ladies :) I've decided to just BD every other day and skip the pee sticks this C. I don't think my doctor told me to use them, he's not monitoring me, and since I'm not doing more than one round of Clomid anyway what difference does it make? I'd much rather keep this C as mellow as possible. But I did put on my "Baby dust fairy" temporary tattoo that came with my last order of PreSeed. Yep, I think I have the magic now for sure! LOL

This Sunday marks the beginning of the wedding madness, with my friends A&R's non-engagement/engagement potluck in the park, and I'm excited! Not just for the party, but also because the weather is supposed to be beautiful and I get to spend the day outside, not doing yard work! The couple doesn't want anything wedding-y or engagement-esque; they want it as casual as possible, and it will be. But I did find some fun ideas for "centerpieces" to jazz it up a little. I think I'm going to get some brightly-colored bottled sodas and put them in little pots/pails/tubs on the picnic tables. Cute AND functional, dontcha think?

There's not much else going on with me right now. Hubs and I are trying to cut back our spending to help ease the costs of acupuncture (and I still need to call that 4th place back!), so we committed to bringing lunches to work every day. I am generally pretty cheap when I buy lunch, but I'm still probably saving around $20 a week. If hubs keeps up on it too that will pay for 60-70% of my acupuncture treatments if I go weekly. Not too shabby! Plus, I'm sure it's much better for me than eating fast food every day! I'm even looking forward to the peanut butter and honey sandwich I threw together this morning. I know, my lunch is fit for a 3rd grader, but I don't care!

Happy Hump Day - only two more days of waking up early before the weekend!

March (and April, May, June, July & August) Madness

As you're aware (or at least, as I've mentioned before, since it would be rather presumptuous of me to expect you to remember every minute detail that I post about my life), I'm a bridesmaid in 2 upcoming weddings, both of which are in August, 2 weeks apart.

In case you didn't know, that means both of these weddings are a mere 5 months away.

It's funny, when one is asked to be a bridesmaid in one wedding, one realizes that there are certain obligations that go along with the honor - the dress, the hair, the parties, the gifts - and all of these obligations require preparation, planning and of course, money. But when one is asked, one thinks of all of these things as taking place in the fuzzy, abstract future. And one is apt to think one will have plenty of time to "save up" for these expenses.

When one is asked to be a bridesmaid in a second wedding, one is so excited that one was asked once again (should I knock it off with the "ones" now? Gotcha, will do) - Ahem - I was (and still am) so excited and honored to be asked, that, although I did realize my expenditures will now be doubled, as will the fullness of my schedule in the coming months, I was willing, even eager, to overlook the obvious stress that being in two weddings, two weeks apart, will doubtless create.

Well, the madness has officially begun and the blinders are OFF. Of course I'm still just as happy to be a part of both weddings, only now I'm a bit stressed too. (Did I mention that between now and August we're also invited to three other weddings and a Bat Mitzvah? Or that almost every member of my local family, including myself, will be celebrating birthdays too?) I'm going to have to get myself a planner because I have a feeling the next few months are going to be pure, uncut Colombian insanity, and with my shoddy memory I'm likely to forget to attend a bridal shower or rehearsal dinner or to wish my husband a happy anniversary or something.

In fact, I think I might just pick one up on my lunch break. And right after that I'll be using office hours to find a very inexpensive location to host an engagement party in 3 weeks... That's totally doable, right??

Weekend update

First off, all my worrying about Oing early was for nothing, and if the bagger with the eggs was a sign it wasn't the sign I was thinking. I took 2 OPKs when I got home on Friday night and both were VERY negative. Whew!! I forgot to take one on Saturday, but yesterday I had an almost positive, so I think I'll be Oing in the next couple of days. What a relief! I don't know exactly what gave me all that EWCM, but I'm definitely going to be really good about taking all my vitamins from now on, and hopefully I'll keep getting it :)

Friday night girls' night was a success! I managed to cram 9 ladies into my little living room where we chatted and played J.ust Da.nce and Mar.io K.art on the Wii. Oh my gosh - J.ust Da.nce ROCKS! It was a huge hit and a couple of my friends took pictures and videos, so as soon as I get those I will definitely be posting them. I suck at dancing (zero coordination), but I guess I got my arms to move right because I kicked butt! Only my friend A (the one who was my MOH) spent the night and we stayed up chatting until about 4:00 a.m. It was great, it totally took me back to our college days. Except now I can't function on 5 hours of sleep the way I could back then...

I was so exhausted on Saturday I ended up taking a nap after A went home... and slept until almost 2:00! Afterwards I met up with my friend B and we went to a benefit event that hubs' uncle was putting on. He is co-chair/spokesperson for the brand-new local chapter of the Best Day Foundation. Uncle C teaches special needs kids how to surf. It's pretty amazing that he makes it possible for kids with ANY kind of special needs - blind, deaf, autistic, those with cancer, physical or mental disabilities, whatever - to surf! After the benefit, B and I had dinner with her parents, who are like my second parents and I haven't seen in forever, and that was really nice.

Sunday I picked hubs up from the airport in L.A. at noon. Amazingly, not only did I get there a little early AND his flight was a few minutes early, but I got parking right in front of his gate, we were out of there in like 5 minutes, and there was virtually no traffic. We spent the rest of the day relaxing and BDing. :) Good times!

Unfortunately the good times ended all too soon, and here we are again at Monday. Sigh... It's not a terrible day, just busy with reports and all the other stuff I need to get caught up on before Wednesday. But I always make time for my bloggy ladies!

Hope you're all having a great day!

Work and the week and stuff

The hubs landed a second interview! Please keep everything crossed that it goes well next week. His friend T works for this company and he's really pulling for him to get hired. He said there are 4 candidates left, so he's not exactly a shoe-in, but they started with 8, so that's not too shabby either. It would be beyond wonderful if he gets hired for this position - more pay, no more working in a branch, casual environment. Seems like a really good place to work, and a much better fit for him.

As far as my work is going... The Hag has decided to stop being haggy (for now, that is - she could change her mind again this afternoon), but my new attitude towards her is "professional and polite, not friendly." I just can't wait until this economy turns back around and I can try to find a job I really like. That probably won't happen for another year or so, but I can hope! Until then, this one pays the bills and I should be grateful for that. At least if the Hag is off my case that's one less thing to fret over.

Well, tonight is my last night with hubs until Sunday. He's leaving tomorrow for his friend's bachelor party trip. I hate when he's gone, but at least with a deadbolt on the front door I'll feel a lot safer alone than last time. I also bring the gun out and keep it nearby at night. What? I said I don't like being alone!

I try to plan as many activities as possible whenever hubs is out of town. This time I only have a couple things going on - girls' night in at my place on Friday, and an event that hubs's uncle is putting on on Saturday night. Girls' night should be fun, I already have more people planning on coming than I expected, and now I have to figure out how to fit everyone into my tiny house! I think I'll do Wii games in the living room, and board games in the kitchen, then movies later on for those planning on staying the night. Hopefully it's a fun time for everyone :)

And hopefully this cold doesn't get any worse or there might not be a girls' night! So far so good, I'm downing my vitamins like they're going out of style and I feel okay. It's mostly just a nuisance at this point. Not much else I can do anyway.

Alrighty, it's obvious I'm just bored today and I'm only delaying the inevitable. I should probably get some work done!

Tangent day

Hubs and I have been speculating for a few days about some friends of ours who got married not quite a year ago. It's been common knowledge in our circle that they've been "not preventing" for the past few months, and a few vague comments on their FB page have led me to conclude that they've succeeded in what they've barely attempted to do. Granted, I don't know for sure if that's the case, but I'm a pessimist, rememeber? (I even use this mug every single day at work, lest I forget.) So I always assume the worst. Well, the worst for me. If it's true it's great news for them of course.

My reaction was predictable, something along the lines of telling hubs in a particularly acidic tone, "UGH. I'm pretty sure she's pregnant," followed by IRL frowny faces a la :( and >:( But what was surprising was hubs's reaction. He said, "Well if they are, I'll be pissed, but..." And I don't remember what he said after the "but," because I was totally caught off guard by hearing he'd be pissed, and I may have stopped listening at that point. So I asked why. I mean, I know why I would be, but his normal response is to say he's happy for his friends. He's generous like that. This time his answer was pretty much exactly the same as what my answer would have been had the question been asked of me - he wants one, it's not fair, etc. etc. And I was all like, "Welcome to the Dark Side, my young apprentice..."

And then we drank our White Russians (since bowling night was cancelled), watched some TV, attempted to make a baby of our own and went to bed.

Which brings us to today: I'm deciding not to worry about others and focus on the task at hand. Today is gyno day! I really hope my doctor has some options for me for more testing. Thank you for all your suggestions, I'm going to push for the 7DPO b/w and the post coital. Although honestly I may have already had the 7DPO testing and I just can't remember... (That's not unusual for me. I once suffered through an entire summer semester of American History at community college so I could transfer to a State school from the private school I had previously attended. It was the single worst class I've ever taken. And I didn't realize until the day before the final that I ALREADY TOOK AMERICAN HISTORY! So I stopped stressing, ditched the final, and graduated with not a blemish on my academic record 2 years later.) Anyway, back to the point! I'm also going to ask whyyy I seem to suddenly have a lack of EWCM when I never had problems with that before. This body of mine needs to get it together already!

Alrighty. Gotta do some work before I leave for the doc. Have a wonderful Friday!

The dude abides

Hubs and I have decided that henceforth, Thursday night is officially Bowling Night. One might assume that since we have committed so enthusiastically to Bowling Night that we are avid bowlers, perhaps members of a league who own our own shoes and monogrammed balls. That assumption, however, would be completely wrong. In fact, I kind of suck at it, and Aaron is about average. But we have fond memories from way back in our early days of dating, of partaking in $2 a game bowling night at the slightly seedier of the two alleys in town. And in our effort to come out of IF-induced hibernation (at least on my part), we thought it was a good idea to create a fun, active routine. And they still do $2 night, so my frugal sensibilities tell me to go for it.

So last night we met up with two other couples at the ol' Bowling Center and played a couple games. As usual I did terrible on the first game, but I almost beat everyone on the second. I scored 123 and then one of our friends came out from behind and beat me by ONE stinkin' point! Oh well! I'm still proud of me for breaking 100!

Of course as we played we'd quote The Bi.g Le.bo.wsk.i, and at one point someone bought everyone a round of White Russians. YUMMY! I hadn't had one since my 21st birthday, when my big brother took me out and bought me one of just about everything, and I forgot how good they are! We decided that we'll order a round of them every Bowling Night, in honor of the Dude.

Hmm... I guess this begs the question: What do you do to keep your mind off IF?

Just the weekend

It's CD20 and UGH. Is this the worst part of the month or what? More than a week until AF is due and of course no sign of nothin' yet. Did I mention patience isn't my strong suit?

Hubs and I had a fun, but too-short, weekend together. We went to happy hour with some friends and then saw Sherlock Holmes with BIL and SIL on Saturday. Sunday we were pretty mellow, we mostly hung around the house and then had dinner with BIL and SIL. I managed to clean the office from top to bottom on Saturday morning. It was in DIRE need of organizing, so I took it one step further and cleaned out my closet (which is in the office) and all the cabinets as well. I dusted everything, got rid of a bunch of old stuff (shoes, some clothes, etc.), the whole shebang! It looks amazing now if I do say so myself! Now if I could just get the rest of the house to clean itself...

At happy hour on Saturday I managed to get myself invited to spinning class with the girls tomorrow after work. No idea WTH I was thinking! I used to go to a spin class at the gym but that was 4 years ago and I'm considerably more out of shape now than I was when I started that class. I am planning on going - I pretty much have to because I was adamant at the time that I would - but I'll be lucky if I survive!!

Seems like whenever I drink (and it doesn't have to be a lot) I get these delusions of grandeur. At least this time it's exercise and won't cost me much money! Usually we (the girls) end up planning trips we can't afford, but that we won't actually end up taking anyway. But while we're drinking we are "DEFINITELY going to do it!!" The guys make fun of us for it all the time, "What are you doing? Planning a cruise to Germany with a stop in Puerto Vallarta and Seattle on the way back?" But it's entertaining, and there are worse things we could do.

Well as you can see I don't have much to talk about! I just don't want to get back to work. I always think about how most of you ladies are in different time zones and are about to go home, and I'm just thinking about having lunch. Ah well, it's all the same really. The good news is we have cake today for one of my underlings' birthdays, AND a three day weekend this week!

Hope your Monday is zooming by :)

Come on!!!

Bah! Why must AF toy with my emotions so? I'm still just barely spotting and it is so GD annoying. Why can't she get her ass in gear already?!

Whew. Sorry, this PMS is brutal! I will now attempt to compose myself... Ahem.

(UPDATE: Woohoo!! AF finally got it together, and it's officially CD1!)

Yesterday I got some very exciting news - my friend A, who was the MOH in my wedding, and who's been with her boyfriend for ten years, got engaged on Monday!! We've been friends since HS and she's the only person I've ever considered my best friend (except hubs of course), but for the past couple of years we haven't been keeping in touch very well until recently. I'm so glad we're back in touch because I would have HATED to miss their engagement! They always knew they'd get married, but obviously it's been a long time coming and much-anticipated for both their families and friends. I joined her and a couple of her other friends last night for a champagne toast and a long look through her 4 year old wedding ideas binder, and it was a blast. They're going to get married for sure in 2010, possibly within the next several months! I am SO EXCITED for them!!!

Well, just one more day until Christmas. And yes, I have to work. Everyone else in the bank is leaving early tomorrow, but both of the departments I supervise will be here until after 3:30 (there's a good, semi-complicated reason, though). It's not too horrible, it'll most likely be DEAD, so we're going to be watching movies in the wire room! ("Elf" I think, and I freakin' love that movie!) We'll definitely have snacks and maybe a delish McD's breakfast too. Also, I work in a particularly professional environment, but they're letting us wear jeans! Amazing. All in all, it's not going to suck TOO much. (Knock on wood!)

Happy Christmas Eve-Eve!