Bad Kitty

Hello friends!  I know I've been MIA, and after reading ^J^'s post today and being completely incapable of leaving a comment due to Blogger's utter stupidity, I figured I might as well just post and tell everyone that I haven't fallen off the planet.

See?  There I am, still on Earth (most of the time).



Now, what's going on with me, you ask?  (Come on, humor me!)  Actually a lot, which is why I haven't been blogging.  I'm a busy bee, trying to make my dreams come true...  Thanks to my upbringing by paranoid parents, I'm afraid to say too much in this very public forum, but I will say it has to do with my professional life, and it has to do with parties and other very fun things!  I'm hoping this venture will get me out of the financial industry once and for all, and get me on my way to self-employment soon!  Wish me luck!

Now for a dramatic recount of Hubs's and my trip to Denver...

Overall it was fun, punctuated by some really not fun moments.  First, our descent and landing on the flight in was extremely turbulent, which didn't bother me at all, but poor Hubs's motion sickness got the best of him for the first time ever on a plane.  Thank goodness for barf bags.  Both of us were still suffering from the awful cough and cold that never ends, too, so neither of us got much sleep that night.  But we powered through the next day and had a good time.  The tour of the mint was fun, and extremely strict!  No joke, three armed officers followed us the whole time - we just wanted to get a good look at all the cool displays they had in there, and the tour guides really rushed us through.  When they say it's a 30 minute tour, they mean it's a 30. Minute. Tour.  I guess they were afraid we were going to steal a handful of pennies or something.

After that we wandered around the city checking out the sights, then went back to the hotel to rest up before the show we were going to that night.  Now, I have to back up a little here.  Normally I'm very paranoid about how Atticus is doing at home while Hubs and I are out of town, but this time I decided not to harrass my brother, who was house sitting, right away.  But I hadn't heard anything from him by this point, and that was a little unusual.  So I checked my phone and... he had just texted saying he forgot to go to my house the day before, and just got there at about 4:00 p.m.!  Which meant the cat hadn't eaten in well over 24 hours.  My poor starving baby!  He was fine of course, but I still freaked out a little.  Also, I was plum out of Xanax.  So I asked Hubs to go down to the bar and get me a martini to calm my nerves.  It helped a lot!  And then we were on our way to the show.

Now for a plug:  We went to this burlesque show in downtown Denver, and it was really super fun!  There were boobies and butt cheeks, but no nipples or anything else south of the border, and the dancers were all shapes and sizes.  It was very kitschy and cute, and I had so much fun that I drank like 2 or so more martinis while we were there.  Now, 3 (or maybe 3.5) martinis isn't a ridiculous amount for me, but I failed to take one key thing into consideration: I live at sea level and Denver isn't called the Mile High City for nothing.  The altitude really took its toll on me that night.  Not only was I seriously hungover even after guzzling water for a couple hours before bed, but between the altitude and super dry weather, I also felt like I couldn't breathe.  And that led me to the first panic attack I've ever had.  At 4 in the morning, on the floor of the hotel bathroom.  Did I mention I was plum out of Xanax?

So needless to say (but I will anyway), I was really happy to get home on New Year's Eve, to my sea-level town that actually has humidity, and to my bed, which I was fast asleep in by 10:00 that night.  I still like Denver, but I swear, every time I travel I realize there's no place I'd rather live in than Southern California!

Well I hope to be able to give you more information about my upcoming venture soon. :) Until then...

Chill mode

Christmas was definitely as hectic and dramalicious as ever, but overall it was good.  I'd even go so far as to say it was really good.  I scored a super sweet new camera from the Hubs, our first really decent one, and have been playing paparazzi for the past three days.  He and I also got to be the star auntie and uncle for bringing the biggest gift for two of our nieces.  I love that about kids - it doesn't matter so much what's inside the huge package as long as it's huge and it's theirs.  (It was one of those cardboard castles that they can color.)  But the best part about Christmas was when my SIL D and I were chatting as the day drew to an end, and she sort of asked and sort of told me that she and BIL had chosen Hubs and me to be godparents for their younger daughter.  I guess they kind of forgot to ask us three years ago when she was born, but who the hell cares?  I'm a godmother :)  How freakin' cool is that??

In other, much less interesting news, I'm sick again.  More coughing and stuffiness, but now I also have a pretty awesome case of laringitis that makes me sound like a sexy three-pack-a-day stripper.  I'm sure it will come in handy tomorrow when I go in for my second interview!  Hopefully they'll be able to understand me.  And hopefully I don't hack anything up on anyone...

Since yesterday was spent back at the in-laws' opening more presents together, today is the first day Hubs and I can just veg out at home and really unwind.  I'm thinking a nap will be in order later on, possibly preceded by eating a lunch that someone else makes for me.  Happy end of Christmas!

The most ___ time of the year

It is so sad how "down" the holiday season seems to be for most Infertiles.  In years past, I definitely felt the dark cloud of IF overshadow my holidays.  That isn't the case so much this year, but still, thanks to family members who are unwilling to be understanding about the struggles of splitting holidays between dozens of people, I have the Christmas blues.

I was actually doing okay even though I spent almost half of December laid up with back pain and sickness.  I was excited about the gifts I got for Hubs and my nieces.  I was able to look past the unavoidable hecticness of Christmas Eve and Day, and looked forward to our romantic getaway a few days after.  But then my older brother vented his frustrations with coordinating holiday plans to me the other day, which, of course I am more than sympathetic with and I was honestly happy to be a listening ear for him.  It just reminded me what a pain in the ass it inevitably is, and how I'm really just trying to please everyone and be everywhere to avoid problems.  Not because I actually enjoy spending three hours in one place, then rushing off to spend 3 hours somewhere else, followed by 3 hours at a third place...  And for the life of me I can't understand why insisting on splitting one day between 3 or 4 events seems to make everyone happier than spreading it all out over a couple of days and being able to spend more time together!

Yesterday I got to hang out all afternoon with my SIL D, and discovered her holiday situation is pretty darn similar to mine.  Only she has two little kids to cart around from place to place.  I used to believe that once Hubs and I were parents our families would be more understanding about our inability to be in 3 places at once... Unfortunately I see now how it is with my brother's family and my SIL & BIL's family, and neither of them gets any breaks for having children.  Looks like it's the curse of having your whole family in one city.  Too bad I love my city so much or I'd seriously consider moving away!

And okay, yeah, IF still casts a bit of a shadow over me this time of year.  I'm no longer jealous of my siblings for having kids while I don't (at least not now while no one is currently pg), but as each cycle comes and goes quite uneventfully, I go through the familiar cycle of hope and disappointment.  It's not as bitter as it used to be, just enough to add a dash of extra "flavor" to my holidays.

Today the east winds are kicking up at a gusty 25-40 mph.  It's dry and disgusting and makes me feel as emotionally whipped up as the leaves and dust swirling around outside.  It's supposed to die down by the weekend, though, and we're expecting a relatively warm and sunny Christmas.  I'm pesronally looking forward to the day after Christmas.  Hubs has the whole week off of work, and even though I'm not working, when he has a day off it's like I do too.  We'll sleep in for a few days, get some stuff done around the house, and then we're heading to Denver for our little getaway!  My mood should be considerably lifted by then.  ;)