Time for the obligatory Mothers Day post. I actually had a pretty good one yesterday. I spent the first part of the day at my sister's place with my family, having brunch and mimosas. My parents remembered that it was Hubs's and my 5th wedding anniversary the day before, and brought us the same little mini rose bush they got for my sister and SIL (both moms), so I didn't feel left out. It was a nice time. The second part of the day was spent with Hubs's family at his uncle's pool. That was a nice time too, except the part where Hubs's aunt made the rounds giving all the moms these cute little beachy sarongs and the ONLY two women who didn't get one were me and my MIL's cousin. I have to admit that stung a bit. I have half a mind to email her all nonchalantly and ask where she got them so I can get one too, but I'm not that passive-aggressive.
I did have a nice moment with my MIL's cousin, the other non-mom at the party, about the choice whether to have kids. She's in her 50's and single. She told me she'd always expected to have a family of her own and it just never worked out that way, but that she loves her life. Clearly she's not bitter about how things turned out at all, and I admire her for that. We talked about how parenthood isn't always all it's cracked up to be. It's hard work 24/7, and although it's apparently rewarding as hell, who's to say those parents wouldn't have found something they felt was equally rewarding had they not had kids? I don't think it's fair to compare parenthood to a childfree life. In order to fully appreciate the rewards of having children, a person has to actually have a child, and vice versa. You can't experience both a childfree life AND the life of a parent, so how can anyone say one option is better or more rewarding than the other?
I have a good friend whose MIL has been not-so-subtly hinting to her since right after my friend got married that she really, really, really wants to be a grandma. My friend and her husband go back and forth between thinking they might one day want kids and that they definitely do not ever want kids, much to her MIL's dismay. And her MIL tries to convince her that deep down she and her son really do want kids and that they'll regret it if they don't have them. I do not envy my friend's situation. Of course, all MIL wants is for her son and my friend to be happy, but she doesn't understand that it's possible for them to be happy without kids because she didn't have the childfree experience. What is unfortunate for my friend is that her MIL can't even imagine being happy without kids in the picture. Hopefully getting MIL to stop harping on the subject will just be a matter of my friend and her husband communicating to her their hopes and dreams for their life.
Who knows why there's such a divide between those with children and those without them? I suspect it has something to do with our Western society. The nuclear family reigns supreme and there's very little respect or attention tossed to people whose lifestyles don't fit that mold. And there's a lot of pressure to fit into it. (That's a topic for a whole separate post. Or maybe even a book!) Granted, I've set up my own walls between myself and those with kids, thanks to infertility. I'm a little more sensitive than most to what I perceive as a sense of superiority some parents seem to wield over childless people. But I'm working on that. I think the solution to closing the divide is about being understanding and compassionate. We're all different and we all make choices based on our unique personalities, histories, and circumstances. I hope that's the attitude I'm putting out these days! To each their own, I say.
So this post wasn't really about Mothers Day after all, but I rather enjoyed my little tangent! Until next time...
5.14.2012
4.18.2012
Auntie Kitty and so forth
This has happened to me several times recently: I come to the computer and sit down, ready to finally publish a new blog post, but by the time everything fires up and I have a blank page and a blinking cursor in front of me I freeze. There's plenty going on in my life but I can't think of a way to make it sound very interesting or relevant to this blog (i.e. the infertility aspect). On the other hand, I'm always saying that this blog is about me in general, which proves that whatever I feel like writing about is relevant, even if it can't be interesting. So I'll just apologize now for that last part. Here's what I've been up to lately:
Still FUNemployed and working on starting my business. It's been even slower going than usual in all things enterprise-related because I've been babysitting two of my nieces three to four days a week for the past few weeks (and for the next few weeks) while their regular childcare provider is on - you guessed it - maternity leave. (YES! I knew I could squeeze in some IF shit.) How wonderfully ironic, eh? For my part it's been a great experience. My nieces friggin' love their Auntie Kitty and I'm getting to build close relationships with them. We go to the park, color (there is a ton - a TON - of coloring going on every day), go for walks around the neighborhood (and occasionally to 7-11 for a Slurpee), and I change my fair share of diapers. It's very character-building actually. And quite exhausting. Not only do you have to keep them entertained enough all day to ensure a nice long nap, but you have to be constantly "on" and alert to any potential danger. Fun with a toddler and 3 year old. On the other hand, it's gratifying to know I'm pretty damn good at it. Yep, ol' barren Kit proves useful in the child-rearing department after all! Nice try, infertility!
Okay that's where my IF talk ends today. I hope, since I already broke my promise that this post would have nothing to do with it. Anyway, the business. I don't have any new business on the business except to say that my childhood friend J will be sharing office space with me! I have a roomie! She's going to be using the back two offices and rear entrance for her private MFT practice, while I occupy the front entrance and two offices. And since I'm not charging her rent (yet), she's offered to buy paint! Which means I get to decorate! Which I couldn't afford to do before and the rooms desperately need! So that's good. I'm throwing myself into that right now so I don't start freaking myself out about how to accomplish what comes after the decorating. One thing at a time. I have time. Gotta keep telling myself that.
More funner stuff is in the near future for me and the Mr. as well. We'll be celebrating Cinco de Mayo this year by toasting our friends' S and K's nuptials. I do love me a good wedding! And it's going to be out of town (in wine country!!! My fave!!!) so even though we technically can't afford it, we're making it an overnight trip, hopefully with some wine tasting. The weekend after that is our 5 year wedding anniversary, and not only did Hubs take several days off work, but he already planned something (which he's not telling me about) too! His silence on the subject does not stop me from asking him daily what he has planned, which I am assured he doesn't appreciate. The thing is I like surprises... I think... well, I haven't actually had very many... I wonder if there's a reason for that? Anyway, in June we're going out of town for one night once again, for that sacred and time-honored tradition known as Beer Fest! I love beer as much as I love wine, and summer is just not summer without plenty of outdoor drinking. After that we're doing our usual summer camping trip, and then two more weddings... Wow, it just occurred to me how busy the next several months are going to be. Lots of celebrating though! And that's always great. :)
I should make myself useful now and wash a dish or two. Apologies for lying to you once in this post, and I trust I didn't lie again when I said it wouldn't be interesting. Thanks for enduring the tedium long enough to see what's been going on in my world!
Still FUNemployed and working on starting my business. It's been even slower going than usual in all things enterprise-related because I've been babysitting two of my nieces three to four days a week for the past few weeks (and for the next few weeks) while their regular childcare provider is on - you guessed it - maternity leave. (YES! I knew I could squeeze in some IF shit.) How wonderfully ironic, eh? For my part it's been a great experience. My nieces friggin' love their Auntie Kitty and I'm getting to build close relationships with them. We go to the park, color (there is a ton - a TON - of coloring going on every day), go for walks around the neighborhood (and occasionally to 7-11 for a Slurpee), and I change my fair share of diapers. It's very character-building actually. And quite exhausting. Not only do you have to keep them entertained enough all day to ensure a nice long nap, but you have to be constantly "on" and alert to any potential danger. Fun with a toddler and 3 year old. On the other hand, it's gratifying to know I'm pretty damn good at it. Yep, ol' barren Kit proves useful in the child-rearing department after all! Nice try, infertility!
Okay that's where my IF talk ends today. I hope, since I already broke my promise that this post would have nothing to do with it. Anyway, the business. I don't have any new business on the business except to say that my childhood friend J will be sharing office space with me! I have a roomie! She's going to be using the back two offices and rear entrance for her private MFT practice, while I occupy the front entrance and two offices. And since I'm not charging her rent (yet), she's offered to buy paint! Which means I get to decorate! Which I couldn't afford to do before and the rooms desperately need! So that's good. I'm throwing myself into that right now so I don't start freaking myself out about how to accomplish what comes after the decorating. One thing at a time. I have time. Gotta keep telling myself that.
More funner stuff is in the near future for me and the Mr. as well. We'll be celebrating Cinco de Mayo this year by toasting our friends' S and K's nuptials. I do love me a good wedding! And it's going to be out of town (in wine country!!! My fave!!!) so even though we technically can't afford it, we're making it an overnight trip, hopefully with some wine tasting. The weekend after that is our 5 year wedding anniversary, and not only did Hubs take several days off work, but he already planned something (which he's not telling me about) too! His silence on the subject does not stop me from asking him daily what he has planned, which I am assured he doesn't appreciate. The thing is I like surprises... I think... well, I haven't actually had very many... I wonder if there's a reason for that? Anyway, in June we're going out of town for one night once again, for that sacred and time-honored tradition known as Beer Fest! I love beer as much as I love wine, and summer is just not summer without plenty of outdoor drinking. After that we're doing our usual summer camping trip, and then two more weddings... Wow, it just occurred to me how busy the next several months are going to be. Lots of celebrating though! And that's always great. :)
I should make myself useful now and wash a dish or two. Apologies for lying to you once in this post, and I trust I didn't lie again when I said it wouldn't be interesting. Thanks for enduring the tedium long enough to see what's been going on in my world!
3.15.2012
I love planning parties
I signed up on this site called House Party a while back, on the recommendation of my friend K. What they do is work with all different kinds of companies to promote their products - from video games to non-profits to cosmetics to food manufacturers... And members like me apply to host try-and-tell type parties for whatever products strike our fancy. If you're chosen to host a party, they send you a party pack with stuff like free samples (or full-size products), coupons, and little gifts to give your guests. All they ask you to do in return is take photos of your party and post them to your House Party page, and spread the word about House Party. K was selected for a pizza party that she applied for, and received coupons to get free pizzas, among other things, to serve at her party. And I just won the mother load: A Benefit Cosmetics House Party.
My party is coming up next Friday and I'm terribly excited. For one, the party pack I received is A. MAZ. ING. I got full size bottles of all 9 shades of their new liquid foundation (Hello Flawless Oxygen Wow), 4 or 5 other full size products (eye shadow, cheek and lip stain, pore minimizer...), plus a ton of samples and cute little goodie bags to give all my guests. I've never used any of Benefit's products before, but I'd heard of them and knew they had a really good reputation, so I was stoked that I actually got chosen to host!
With St. Pat's day coming up, I've been really busy with my biz and cleaning up my STORE (did I tell you I have a storefront??? It still needs a lot of work, but I'm super excited about it!), so I've had to put off jumping in to planning my girls' night. But now that I'm almost totally prepped for this Saturday I'm itching to focus on the party! Why, oh, why can't life be nothing but fun all the time?
Just because I can't contain myself, I shall tell you what I have planned. And maybe you can help me with some suggestions!
I'm asking all my guests to come with a clean face and their clean makeup brushes, cuz of course we're gonna be trying on all these fancy cosmetics! My house is so small, I've had to limit my guest list so there's enough room for everyone to be comfortable, but on the plus side that means everyone will get to take home a ton of samples, and many will have a whole bottle of foundation to take with them too (everyone will at least get a sample of their shade). I'm giving away a few of the other full size products with simple games. But I'm kind of stumped on what games to play - I only have one idea so far that I'm calling "Natural Beauties." I'll have a bunch of photos of celebrities without any makeup on and generally looking so awful they're all but unrecognizable, and whoever names the most of them wins a prize. So if anyone has ideas for simple prize games, I'm all ears!
I'll have 4 makeup stations at the kitchen table, where there's enough space and decent lighting, but I'm gonna need mirrors. Maybe thrift stores? Or I can ask around to see if I can borrow some. (Remember, I'm on a tight budget!) And hors d'oeuvres will be served in the living room, along with beverages. Several of my friends have dietary restrictions so I'm going vegetarian and vegan with the food, with minimal sugar and starch, as well as serving fun non-alcoholic drinks in addition to the booze. Girly music and pink decorations will abound... And that's about it!
I really recommend checking out HouseParty.com. After all, it's free stuff, and who doesn't love free stuff??
My party is coming up next Friday and I'm terribly excited. For one, the party pack I received is A. MAZ. ING. I got full size bottles of all 9 shades of their new liquid foundation (Hello Flawless Oxygen Wow), 4 or 5 other full size products (eye shadow, cheek and lip stain, pore minimizer...), plus a ton of samples and cute little goodie bags to give all my guests. I've never used any of Benefit's products before, but I'd heard of them and knew they had a really good reputation, so I was stoked that I actually got chosen to host!
With St. Pat's day coming up, I've been really busy with my biz and cleaning up my STORE (did I tell you I have a storefront??? It still needs a lot of work, but I'm super excited about it!), so I've had to put off jumping in to planning my girls' night. But now that I'm almost totally prepped for this Saturday I'm itching to focus on the party! Why, oh, why can't life be nothing but fun all the time?
Just because I can't contain myself, I shall tell you what I have planned. And maybe you can help me with some suggestions!
I'm asking all my guests to come with a clean face and their clean makeup brushes, cuz of course we're gonna be trying on all these fancy cosmetics! My house is so small, I've had to limit my guest list so there's enough room for everyone to be comfortable, but on the plus side that means everyone will get to take home a ton of samples, and many will have a whole bottle of foundation to take with them too (everyone will at least get a sample of their shade). I'm giving away a few of the other full size products with simple games. But I'm kind of stumped on what games to play - I only have one idea so far that I'm calling "Natural Beauties." I'll have a bunch of photos of celebrities without any makeup on and generally looking so awful they're all but unrecognizable, and whoever names the most of them wins a prize. So if anyone has ideas for simple prize games, I'm all ears!
I'll have 4 makeup stations at the kitchen table, where there's enough space and decent lighting, but I'm gonna need mirrors. Maybe thrift stores? Or I can ask around to see if I can borrow some. (Remember, I'm on a tight budget!) And hors d'oeuvres will be served in the living room, along with beverages. Several of my friends have dietary restrictions so I'm going vegetarian and vegan with the food, with minimal sugar and starch, as well as serving fun non-alcoholic drinks in addition to the booze. Girly music and pink decorations will abound... And that's about it!
I really recommend checking out HouseParty.com. After all, it's free stuff, and who doesn't love free stuff??
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