Mass hysteria! Okay that might be stretching it...

Last Friday I thought I might be KU because I started spotting - 5 days before AF was due, and I'm thinking, hmmm... implantation?? But NO! AF showed her ugly face the very next day! And with a vengeance. So not only is my usually extremely regular period (can I throw any more modifiers in there?) more than 2 days early for the first time in YEARS, but I am on day 5 today and still going strong. Normally AF lasts me 7 days on the nose, so I should be starting to taper off by now but I feel like I'm still on day 3.

So I'm lightheaded from all the dang bleeding, I have no idea when it's going to stop, and I'm generally a bit worried about what's going on with me right now. Just goes to show ya, you never really know anything!

I made an appointment with my GYN next week to start moving forward on IF stuff, so at least I'll be able to ask him about the AF fiasco. I already had the pelvic ultrasound, so I'm not really sure what will happen next, maybe blood tests or something? Guess I'll find out in a week...


Never so sad, nor so delusional

This morning I was devastated to hear that the Adam Carolla radio show has been cancelled, and tomorrow will be their last broadcast. Apparently there's going to be a formatting change for the station (I guess there just weren't enough top 40 stations in LA already). But, come on! Didn't they stop to think how this would affect ME? Now what am I going to do on my commute - listen to the local stations? Probably not, those DJs are even worse than the music they play. Sigh...

Okay. So please tell me I'm not the only one who does this - I posted earlier about not TTCing this month and next, and SO sadly the hubs and I have only FDed once this month (stupid YI!). Here's the problem: I continue to cling to the possibility that that one time was enough to knock me up because I may have O'd super early. I didn't use OPKs because I knew we weren't trying, but I had abundant EWCM on CD 9, exactly how it is when it comes along with my O (usually CD 13-17) and we got down the day before that. And I did not get the EWCM around my usual O time. No, I am not having any pg symptoms, and I'm expecting AF next week sometime. But seriously, why do I do this to myself when the chances are so slim? Hopefully AF won't arrive on the later side and I can quit deluding myself soon.

Now I have to go find something to keep my brain occupied for the next 6 days...


At Least it's not Monday

It does feel like Monday though. One of the perks about working at a bank is getting all the cool Federal holidays off - about 10 a year (and floating holidays when they land on a weekend). However, after getting used to extra days off every month towards the end of the old year and beginning of the new year, we have this 2+ month drought in spring that really sucks. And since yesterday was Presidents Day, that drought starts TODAY. Oh I cannot wait until Memorial Day...

Anyway, Valentine's weekend (yes I claim the whole weekend, much like how I claim my birthweek rather than just the one day) was, well, eventful. After getting into a huge fight on Saturday the hubs and I had dinner with the BIL and his wifey at Black Angus. I know, fancy right? And we had a coupon - even fancier! It was fun though, my SIL and I got a bit tipsy and after dinner (while the boys dozed off on the couch watching anime) she showed me the many joys and oddities that comprise Etsy. Including Courtney Love's page which, if you read it, will confirm for you that she is indeed still on drugs.

Sunday and Monday we did our part to boost the economy with the help of our tax return and a few super Presidents Day sales. We actually didn't spend very much, and I think we did pretty well! We ended up with a lot for our money, and now our little love bungalow is looking much more put together. We've been struggling to make our office look nice since we moved in, and I think it is finally starting to work. Monday morning the hubs and I revisited our Saturday fight, as is always recommended in healthy relationships, but at least felt better about everything afterwards this time.

Then more crap!! I discovered last night that I have a YI. This is BS. For about 3 years I'd get them regularly - every month during the summer, and occasionally throughout the year. I went to a few different doctors and tried lots of different remedies, including some weird herbal stuff (ironically I eventually found that Monistat 1 Day followed immediately by Monistat 3 Day works like a charm), and was generally miserable. Then about 2 years ago they miraculously tapered off. Nothing for over 1 and 1/2 years, until now. Ugh. So you can imagine that for me it's not just the YI - it's the fear that the cycle is going to start all over again. I'm going to try really hard not to be paranoid though, and just chalk it up to my lately inflamed sweet tooth and recent ingestion of large quantities of junk food instead.


Taking a breather

Without going into details, we have to take this cycle and next off of TTCing (TingTC?). Ya know, though, maybe it is for the best. I keep saying how I need to relax, quit putting so much pressure on myself, etc., but every month as soon as I ovulate the possibility of being pregnant (however remote) is the only thing I can think about. Maybe a couple months of knowing it won't happen will help me start focusing my energies in other directions, and make it easier when we start trying again in a couple months. Let's hope.

Luckily I do have some projects in the works to keep myself diverted:

1. I'm getting back into Photoshop, hooray! I set up an account on Etsy where I'll be selling custom invitations, announcements, thank you cards, and the like. So far I have two whole designs! Haha. But that's been fun for me so far. BONUS - it will help to expand my options for conversation topics with my two domestic and creative sisters-in-law.

2. A friend and I are writing a book together. We just started working on it this month and are putting an outline together right now. It will probably take us a good six months to actually write it, and once we get into it I'm sure it will start taking over - and that's a good thing! I love writing almost as much as I love Photoshopping. I even kind of miss college because I enjoyed writing papers so much... Sad, I know.

3. I need to start planning and planting my garden soon. It's been raining like crazy here lately, which is awesome since California is in a drought right now, but it has definitely hindered my home improvements timetable! I suppose I could take this time to research what kind of plants will grow back there, since I'm clueless about that stuff and my thumb is decidedly black.

4. With the rain comes snow, and I need to go snowboarding more often. I have a brand new snowboard, free access to a cabin in Big Bear practically whenever I want, and about 6 friends who'd like to go with me at any given time. What's my problem? I really should take more advantage of that.

Okay I feel better now. With all this stuff to do, who has time for babymaking anyway?


Bend, Breathe, someday Conceive - Some fertility aid product reviews

I never buy anything online without reading a handful of positive and negative reviews first, preferably on a site other than the one selling the products. So I thought I'd throw out some reviews about a couple items I have recently tried in my quest for conception, both purchased from http://www.early-pregnancy-tests.com/. As TTCers go, I guess you could say I'm a beginner, so this is geared towards other beginners too. I've tried to be conservative in my descriptions, but be warned, there may be a bit TMI...

Bend, Breathe and Conceive
I purchased this video last month, and I must say I'm loving it. Being out of shape as I am, it is sufficiently (and okay, in some places rather) challenging, but still clear enough that I can follow along during those poses where I can't see the TV. And the guided meditation at the end is soooooo soothing and relaxing. The instructor/doctor also includes this super cool educational snippet that explains exactly how stress can negatively affect reproduction. So if you're thinking about buying it, do it. No, I'm still not pregnant, but I've only actually done the routine 2 or 3 times now, so I'll keep you posted. And until then, I've got something that helps to relieve some of my excess stress. Hooray!

I also tried this last month for the first time (see my post entitled Lucky Month 11 - I first purchased it at a local pharmacy, but it's $5 cheaper on the website, so I ordered there this month). I am always wary of "intimate moisturizers" as I have an, erm, extremely sensitive "area," and am prone to infection. However, I had no problem at all with this stuff, and found it to be very helpful for those times when babymaking felt more like a chore than a pleasure if you know what I mean. I did, and still do, have trouble with the application of this product though! It's basically a thick liquid that you have to squeeze up and out of the soft plastic tube thing. Apparently the makers of this product didn't take GRAVITY into consideration when designing the applicator. And don't get me started on having to keep squeezing the tube when removing it to avoid suckage... Anyway, great product, not so great design of the applicator.

Ovulation Test Strips
I haven't actually tried these yet, they just came in the mail yesterday and today is only CD 7. I'm sure they do the trick and will only post something if they are particularly sucky. However, I will say that I was very impressed how quickly my package arrived - I just ordered them and the PreSeed on Friday, and found it on my doorstep when I got home from work yesterday - Monday! Nice. Plus, $7.70 for 7 strips beats the hell out of $20 for a box of the same from the drug store, especially when you're getting free shipping. And, they threw in 2 pregnancy test strips to boot. I'm not sure if they advertise on their site that that's what they do, but it was a pleasant surprise to me anyway.

If I can say I helped one person be a wiser internet shopper I will feel that I've done my duty, so enjoy! Good luck and godspeed.