A day

I'm having a rough day and I can't quite put my finger on why.

The weekend was very nice.  Hubs and I went on our first ever camping trip alone, up north a couple of hours to a campground we'd never been to before.  It was beautiful with tall spindly pine trees and the biggest eucalyptus trees you've ever seen, right next to an ocean lagoon and estuary.  The trip was kind of an adventure between not having any power in the camper we borrowed from my parents, my coming down with a cold on the drive up, and AF showing up on Saturday... four days late... just as I was beginning to convince myself that I could be pregnant...

On second thought, that last thing might be part of why I'm having a rough day today.

I am tired.  AF is kicking my butt and my cold is still lingering, although it's getting a little better every day.  I guess I really did get my hopes up about the possibility of being pg, as stupid of me as that obviously was.  Hubs has been a bit more vocal than usual about his desire for kids lately.  He even says he hopes I can stay on unemployment for the maximum amount of time (assuming Congress decides to pass the extension benefits again at the end of the year, fingers crossed) just so we can keep having lots of sex and I can hopefully get pregnant.  Huh.  Well it's a nice hope anyway.

Speaking of unemployment, yep I'm still on it with no real job prospects on the horizon.  Which is probably another reason for my bad mood today.  I keep telling myself I can't make the jobs appear and I can't make employers call me.  All I can do is keep my resume looking as good as possible and keep sending it out anywhere I can.  Not that FUNemployment has ceased being fun.  Obviously our camping trip was a good time, and it's very nice having plenty of time to keep house, work on projects, and generally goof off (ah, I'm talking about you, PINTEREST).

Now, you haven't heard from me in a month and it sounds like I'm just as depressed and pessimistic as I was before I escaped from the 7th circle of hell, but that isn't true.  I just decided to come here at a bad time!  I've actually gotten to be a lot more positive over the past couple of months, and definitely a LOT less stressed.  I can tell because the jeans I'd shrunk out of a few months ago fit snugly again, my acne has cleared up almost completely (hallelujia!), and I finally feel like if I found a job right now I could actually stomach going to work!  Next time I write a post I'll make sure I'm in a better mood so I can prove how happy I really am.  ;)


The Barreness said...

You sound ok to me, it is ok to not be cheery all the time...really.
You also sound like you are in the mist of decompression. It takes a bit to ween off the hellish reality back into real reality and it sounds like you are doing just fine.
Evil AF is a wicked one, she seems to like showing up late and making a big scene.
Kick her back and keep your chin up knowing you are one tough cookie!

Heather said...

oh Pinterest....you keep me from doing everything I'm suppose to do during the day. I am an addict.