What is the date today?? Seriously, I'm starting to have trouble keeping up with the days of the week, much less the date now that one day is pretty much exactly the same as the next.
Not that I'm complaining. I'm very much enjoying my temporary life of leisure, but it can get boring being home alone most of the time. And you know what they say about idle hands being the devil's playground? Well, an idle mind isn't any better. I try to keep myself busy with housework and that keeps my hands from doing the devil's dirty work, but it's not much for intellectual stimulation. Plus I have altogether too much time to THINK.
One of the things I've been thinking a lot about is, of course, infertility. I'm getting a little bitter again, people, and I don't like it. Several of my girlfriends have new babies or are pregnant or wanting to get pregnant right now too, which isn't helping matters. I find myself comparing my life to theirs and I don't measure up. I'm feeling "behind" when it comes to almost everything - money, home, career, education; but especially family. I talk a big game about how being child-free is perfect for Hubs and I right now, how having children now would be terrible timing, and how much I enjoy my quiet home... But if I'm being 100% honest with myself I have to admit that I do want a child. Just one.
I'm not about to start TTC naturally again and we clearly can't afford any medical intervention while I'm FUNemployed. They're just thoughts going through my head. Dreams. Wishes. Whatever. It's clear I need more to do.
So I started writing again. I have a start on what might become my book that I like more than the three other starts I had months ago, and that's been a fun creative outlet. I've been working on some things for my women's group too, and looking for volunteer opportunities during weekdays. I'd like to say I've been using my free time to finally tackle some projects around the house like papering the kitchen shelves and painting the door trim... but I haven't. At least the dishes and laundry are getting done regularly though, right?
I'll need to start doing more stuff just so I have more to write about. I think I'm getting less interesting by the day! Well, I did do one interesting thing this week. On Thursday night I went out with some ladies from my group to see Steel Magnolias at the local playhouse. My goodness, if you think the movie is a tear-jerker you should see it performed live. Not a dry eye in the house! Oh! And it was finally cool enough out that I could wear the new cute sweater dress I got for my birthday. Mmm... I just love fall fashion. Too bad I won't be able to afford it this year.
Well, maybe I'll paper the kitchen shelves next week so I'll have an exciting story for you all. ;) Happy weekend! (It is the weekend, right?)
2 comments:
I really admire you for keeping yourself busy. it's so easy to get down on yourself. i wish i had your ambition when it comes to being busy.
and i love your word "funemployed"
Oh I get like that some days as well...isn't it great not knowing what day it is. Glad you are making the most of your time. I can come up with great ideas all day long, but my follow through could use a little help! ;)
Good to hear from you, been missing your quirky posts!! =)
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