3.03.2011

Nervous Nelly

I woke up this morning with a stomach ache.  That's pretty much par for the course lately, although for the past several days I've been feeling less anxious than usual.  All good things must come to an end though, and the butterflies came back about 30 minutes before my alarm went off.  Perfect timing!  The stupid thing is the things that disrupt my sleep and make me want to yak are usually really small.  For example:

I decided last night that Hubs and I would join my siblings in a trip to San Diego this Sunday for my grandma's birthday.  I haven't seen her in... well, I'm ashamed to admit how long considering she only lives about 3 hours away.  There's no excuse.  But this Sunday is also the first Sunday of the month, which is the day my immediate family usually gets together for dinner at my parents' house.  Which we haven't done in months.  And my parents tend to take it really personally when we can't make it, even if the reason is the birthday of one of their parents.  So I'll call my mom tonight and let her know, and hopefully she'll decide that she and my dad will come down to SD for grandma's birthday too and solve that problem.  I know I shouldn't feel guilty about this, but I do.

The ladies are coming to my place tonight for our bi-monthly meeting.  I'm not really worried about it, but it does cause a certain amount of anxiety.  I'll have about an hour after I get home to straighten up, de-cat-hair as much as possible, put out the drinks and decide what to say for my toast.  And I would have come to work early so I could leave early, but I have to help the new hire do end of day... only she called in sick today.  Oh, Murphy and your law!  You got me again.

Before I left work last night my boss told me (again, which is nice) great job, and that she might have something for me today depending on how our projects are going.  Well, with the new hire here and it being the time of the month when I have to do my bajillion reports, I haven't had much time to work on the projects.  I'm not worried that I won't get my "something," whatever it may be, I'm worried the status of my projects won't be acceptable and she'll find out I'm not really the amazing employee she thinks I am.

Last but not least, as I was contemplating all these things while going through my morning routine, I realized that exactly one week from today is March 10th.  My EDD.  And oh yeah, I'm supposed to start my period that day.  Fuck. 

And this is why I have a prescription for Xanax.  Thank God for pharmaceuticals.

1 comment:

E said...

I hate anxiety. I get bouts of it here and there for no damn reason. Well, I guess I think there isn't a reason. Ugg.

((hugs))