Ouch. I have cramps.

But luckily they are not as bad as I was expecting. Yes, AF decided to work double time on me to make up for last month's weirdly light flow, talk about YUCK, but at least she isn't wringing my uterus out like a ShamWOW.

I'm going to call the doctor about my suspected endo. I'm just a little confused about how to go about it. I only had two or three visits to the gyno before he referred, or attempted to refer, me to the RE, and at one point he did ask me if I get bad cramps. I told him, "Not too terrible." Now I'm eating my words. Plus I did specifically ask him about endo before he sent me packing.

Honestly, my cramps aren't bad every month, maybe only once every two to three months. I'm just wondering how to broach the subject because A. I don't want to lie or exaggerate, but I want the doctor to order the lap, and B. I don't want to raise suspicions with my insurance that it's actually for IF and have them end up denying me. Yeah, I know, it all seems very shady. But give me a break - my HMO covers hardly anything. But if it covers the lap it'll probably pay a lot more than our PPO will when we switch, so I want to take advantage.

Why does it have to be so complicated?

Okay, on an almost completely unrelated note - I was thinking recently how rarely anyone IRL who knows about my IF asks me and hubs how we are doing. I get it, people don't want to bring it up and risk making us sad. But on the other hand, it would be really nice to know someone cares and is thinking about us. How about you - Do the people who know about your IF ask how you are doing once in a while or do they keep their lips zipped? And how would you prefer it?


Anonymous said...

I would talk to your doctor about your concerns about insurance. I talked to my OB/GYN about our concerns with insurance and she now codes everything differently...it's all about the medical codes.

You could also call your insurance and ask about what specifically is covered under "fertility" (it's a broad topic). Ask for what medical codes are not normally covered under your insurance. So far everything done for me for the sake of "fertility" has been under a different code, so I haven't had to pay more money.

It's been my experience that if I tell my doctor exactly what is going on...they will do what they can to help.

As for our struggles with IF, very few people know, and those who do don't ask too much unless I bring it up. I like it that way...it keeps things from getting too emotional for us.

Good luck with everything.....

Anonymous said...

When I had my Lap done I made it clear that it had nothing to do with infertility it had to do with PAIN !!! It is all about the correct coding like the pp said.

Once everyone ( meaning mostly family ) found out we were ttc and having issues they basically shunned us. They still do today. I think they are all afraid of upsetting us or something.

Caitlin said...

I don't think it's shady at all. My dr coded my lap as pain - and you could clearly tell that they were going in there to unblock my tubes. I say do whatever you need to do to get it covered - and most doctors are on the same page.

I would like if people asked how we are every now and again. It makes what we are going through valid, y'know? Like they actually care and acknowledge it as an issue.

Anonymous said...

I say lie and say you are having the worst cramps ever!

ps. I am IRL and I care! I heart you and want you to have a mini me...well mini you ;)


Kitty said...

Hi Amber! You found me :)

Thanks, I heart you too!!

E said...

I would definitely bring it up to your doctor. Just be blunt about it and tell him/her what you want done and why. It can't hurt. As far as insurance, they will figure out how to code it.

I think I like when people who know don't bring it up unless I do. Some days I just need to talk about and other days I need to NOT talk about it. My friend had me crying at a party one time because she wanted to "talk" about it and I just wasn't in the frame of mind to talk at that time.

But, it is nice to know that people do care.

M said...

I found that when I first told friends about my IF, they would ask about it a lot but now that 2 years has gone by and no baby, they don't really ask a whole lot about it anymore. I'm ok with it I think.

I totally know what you mean about reporting symptoms to your doctor. You don't want to belittle your symptoms but you don't want to make them sound worse either. If you want the lap, I say go about your shady ways to do it. It's crap that we have to pay for all this stuff.

Christina said...

I have an HMO too so I can relate to this. For my lap I went to my gyno, after he referred me to a RE, and told him over the last 3 months my cramps were getting worse and worse. I told him I went from taking 1 Aleve to taking 3 or 4 extra strength Midol a day to fight the cramps. I did lie a little, the cramps weren't THAT horrible but it was the only way to get the lap.

^J^ said...

Sorry bout the cramps, vicodin has been my new friend. HA!

100% agree! If someone had cancer(God forbid) You KNOW IRL people would ask how you were, or how things were going. And YES, I get that IF is not the same as cancer, but it would be nice to know that your fam/friends care about whats happening in your life enough to ask. *sigh*

Steph O. said...

I think that most drs are willing to recode if you explain it. They have the goal of 1)helping you & 2)getting paid for it. I don't think it's dishonest. You ARE in pain!

About the IRL friends, some ask, some don't. It doesn't really bother me, but I prefer it if they drop it when I don't want to talk about it. It doesn bother me if I've explained that it's not easy for me & they make "the stupid comments".